• jjjalljs
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    6 months ago

    Not long ago I saw a woman’s profile on tinder in NYC that said “No bi men”. I guess it’s good that she put her phobia right out front like that.

    • jak@sopuli.xyz
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      6 months ago

      I’m a 90s kid, with a stepsister the same age (who grew up in a Massachusetts college town, at that). When I was in college, I dropped my then boyfriend’s ex’s name in a conversation with my dad and stepsister (he was out already and didn’t make a secret of anything, he was cool with it, I swear). My stepsister asked all shocked if I knew he was bi when we started dating and then explained that she’d never date a bi guy, because she could never “be sure”. My dad made a boomery joke and said something noncommittally biphobic.

      I’m so grateful I had that conversation before I came out to my family. I’m bi and an afab egg. I just married a bi man, and I told him pretty early on that I don’t know what the situation with my gender is yet. His response was “that’s why we date bi people, we like all the situations,” which had never occurred to me (sometimes I’m dumb), but it was a perfect level of humor and acceptance for the moment.

      I’m sorry, this was a super long and mostly irrelevant comment. I intended to agree that biphobia is present in the people and places you’d least expect, even when straight up homophobia isn’t (stepsister was a member of the gsa and loved pride parades)

      • nixcamic@lemmy.world
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        5 months ago

        afab egg

        I know what both of these words mean separately, but together I’m lost. Was egg a typo?

        • jak@sopuli.xyz
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          5 months ago

          I’m like 90% sure I’m a trans dude, but I’m not quite there yet (I’m immigrating and in grad school and just don’t have the time or security rn to do a deep self analysis, plus I think I’d be a much less attractive man. I know that’s less important for men, but it feels like I’d be shooting myself in the foot. Also, my husband loves how I smell and taking hormones might change it to something he didn’t like as much, which I would hate). Therefore, I haven’t hatched yet.

          Egg just basically means “pre-trans”

          https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/c/egg_irl

          /c/egg_irl for examples