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  • Pons_Aelius@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    I was pressured by my partner to have children. I had said from the outset of the relationship that I didn’t want kids. That was all fine, for the first year-18 months, Then things started to change.

    how that played out?

    We did not have children, we are no longer together.

    • xeddyx@lemmy.nz
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      1 year ago

      But were they also not in concrete agreement when you said that you didn’t want kids? Or did they only give a vague response? Just curious what was the initial agreement exactly, and how did they changed their stance, because I’m currently on the market myself and I’ve been pretty upfront that I don’t want kids, and it’s usually my very first question before I proceed to even ask them about anything else. Those who don’t want kids are also generally upfront about it and would agree immediately, whereas others may either give a vague reply or be on the fence, or straight up say they wanted kids - all of which would be an immediate rejection from me. Unless they’re in firm agreement, I don’t proceed any further with the chat.

      • Pons_Aelius@kbin.social
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        1 year ago

        I mentioned on our first or second date that I did not want kids. They were not as strong in stating it but I received no push back. So I assumed they were ok with it.

        In the end they revealed that they thought that I would eventually grow up and want kids.

        That relationship ended about 12 years ago.

        Since then I have been more like yourself. I make sure early on that any possible partner knows that this is something that will not change.