It’s SFW if you’re crossing the Equator?

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I love headlines like this. “in 2 months”???

Is that a long enough time to get them trained for a mission like that?!?

I’m on my 3rd Husky (one them was white…he was a cool dude).

I love the breed, but I’m getting too damn old to harness up my current one, grab my skateboard and MUSH!

Great dogs…but can be a nightmare for the uninformed/unprepared!

I’m going all-in on shitpost.

Military personnel are still just people doing the job…just like the rest of us.

Go on…you have my attention…

That’s just the lid…usually the toilets are about knee high.

But I would never NOT have a bidet in my house ever again. And yes, I’m in the U.S.

I’m almost positive that’s a Dalmation.

Scooby-Doo would a word with you…he just enjoyed some things in the past that are now legal in most U.S. states. That doesn’t make him, or his relatives “disgusting”!

Ah…thank you! Now we’re in the spirit!

I can’t believe I haven’t seen a “your mom” joke in here yet! WTF people?!? ;D

I’ve only been married for 28 years…we’re not ready for kids! #idiocracy

There’s three of us!

I love keeping them on the phone as long as possible! It’s damn-near a hobby of mine.

Today I got one I’ve never heard before. They were from the “Automobile Collision” Company that said they have money for me from my accident! I like free money…let’s do this!

They transferred me three times up the chain…final one was their lawyer - that’s where the call dropped. Suffice it to say…I was disappointed to not hear the end.

One of my favorites, in case y’all would like to use it - I claimed (in a Southern drawl) I was an Alligator Hunter…in Nevada. “Business is a bit slow…and I can’t go to the zoo no more.” Kept them on the line for 44 minutes…almost beat my record.

I have yet to meet a dog that doesn’t like Bully Sticks. For the uninitiated, I’d hesitate to look up what they are - you’ve been warned!

Do we win a prize for this…please? It’s too hot to sweat, I’m not thirsty, and the shakes are normal, right? RIGHT?!?

I like you…your humor sounds as twisted as mine! Don’t ever change!

But…but…if your glasses are on the bedside table WHILE you’re sleeping - how to you get any reading accomplished?!? ;)

Apparently I got old enough to require reading glasses now (FML) - so reading before bed isn’t as easy an option.

So I found audiobooks via my local library (in the U.S.) that I can just download - w00t!

I still PREFER the old “dead-tree” format, but audiobooks have become a replacement.

And don’t forget - you can increase the speed of the narrator if you feel like their speaking-cadence is too slow.

If it were American “cheese” he’d be preserved for a millenia!