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First of all, bless you for having that mindset. I couldn’t possibly understand getting upset that you’d want to return the favor, or that you wanting to please her as well means that you didnt enjoy it.
Do you offer because you’re turned on and genuinely want to make her feel good, or is your offer more based in the tit for tat mentality? Maybe it feels transactional to her if you always offer right after.
If it does bother her so much, maybe you can talk about it and ask her to request it when she wants it if she doesn’t already . Or, instead of offering right after, save it for later and surprise her so that it doesn’t seem obligatory, is that is in fact her issue here.
I guess another way to look at this is that you aren’t taking anything from her, she’s giving it to you, presumably because it makes her happy to please you. That can be satisfying in and of itself for the giver. I think communication about this stuff is key, just keep checking in here and there and enjoy
I WENT ON MY FIRST BIKE PACKING TRIP IN THE SAN JUAN ISLANDS LAST WEEK! IT WAS SUPER BEAUTIFUL AND SUPER CHALLENGING BUT I FEEL LIKE SUCH A STRONG LIL GUY!!! I TRIED TO CONQUER THE CHAMBERS CLIMB BUT I WAS PUNISHED FOR TRYING!! HERE’S TO TRYING AGAIN AND AGAIN TIL I MAKE IT TO CREST WITHOUT GETTING OFF MY BIKE ONCE!!!
I AM CHALLENGING MYSELF TO RIDE 1000 MILES BY THE END OF THE YEAR!! 929 TO GO!! I AM SCARED!!