im about to call my mom and dad and say i need them and then just slap the shit out of them both. i cant believe they decided to have kids knowing that i would eventually have to deal with the job system. used to think that when i become an adult i will finally get to escape my abusive household and finally be happy but i was foolish to think so. now 5 decades of my life will consist of this bullshit. i will also have to deal with the Euroid Style Pension System where i somehow work for 50 fucking years of my life and they give me a check that barely covers rent. i want to visit my government building some time and ask everyone personally how they think we will do this like genuinely. how are we supposed to live when our average salary does not even cover half of rent?
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honestly my parents dont impress me either
Abusive household survivor here. What I can say is that, while working for porky absolutely does suck, and waking up to an existential crisis like this is something that just happens every now and then, the autonomy you get from being able to cover your own survival needs is amazing. You need to grind it out for a while, but eventually you reach a point where you can just tell any toxic relative to treat you with respect or fuck right off, and for me at least that feels very liberating.
yeah i want to get a job right now and study later (im going to be a psychologist so an exhaustive degree thats gonna need my maximum concentration) but my mom of course wants me to go to college right now due to some thoughts only her brain could cook up
If I may; I can’t speak for your parents, only from my own experience.
I only had the opportunity to attend college once my baby’s father and I parted, mostly due to my own poor choices, reasons/excuses notwithstanding. So it meant constantly skipping semesters to save up enough to make bills while working less, studying more, and parenting alone, basically doubling the time to earn a degree. As circumstances changed, often unexpectedly, I found it necessary to work more, degrading my ability to dedicate the necessary time and attention to my studies, so after earning that degree, I worked as much as I could, telling myself I would return. Decades later, as costs and inability to make informed, solid decisions based on foresight (which either depends in upbringing or hindsight with the ability to meaningfully reflect, and live from a place of inner security, rather than panic/survival), I only went back for trade degrees which were a good idea at the time, until market conditions rendered maintaining licensure until demand increased not feasible.
As much as it stinks, if you have the opportunity for financial support while being able to dedicate your time and effort to a healthy balance of study, rest, recreation, I hope you will consider putting your education first. You may be able to do a work-study program (if it’s available where you are) to earn a little bit, while also getting real world experience that contributes to required study credits.
i do want to go to college but i want to become a psychologist and honestly i have a lot of issues i have to deal with if i want to work with vulnerable people. it should also be worth noting that i do live in a very abusive household atm and just want to get out.
i have a lot of issues i have to deal with if i want to work with vulnerable people
I think this is exactly what you would learn in psychology university, ive personally known a lot of “troubled”(for lack of a better word) psychologists and that didnt necessarily make them bad at their job, its like saying that because an oncologist smokes theyre bad at their job.
Also, i think university generally speaking is a great place to make meaningful connections, you know, others being in a really similar stage of life and all that.
I think that if you want to go and you can go you should definitely go, no?
Wherever path you choose i wish you the best of lucks Comrade!!!
no, university does not necessarily mean you will be able to make connections
I hope things improve for you soon
I see. I don’t know if campus housing is available and feasible for you. It wasn’t for me, which meant the usual bills and utilities, as well as food, transportation, day care, toddler clothing and foods, as well as mowing the lawn, and usual chores. It’s a lot, without a child. Of course your physical and mental health and safety take priority. I wish you the best, and hope you find an acceptable solution.
Would it be possible for you to go to university in a different city? You would still be dependent on your parents but it at least gives you some breathing room where you don’t have to deal with their shit on a daily basis.
If you want to study psychology seriously and not just get a piece of paper from a shady degree mill where you can feasibly just show up for the exams, your best shot by far is to do it now with support from your parents. It absolutely sucks but the alternative is that you may never get to go to university afterwards. My partner left his abusive household the moment he finished highschool and was able to find work, but was never able to attend any form of higher education afterwards due to how logistically unfeasible it is when you are on your own and working exhausting unskilled jobs.
i keep thinking of getting my apartment and moving out as my next big life goal but im sitting down with the thought and i realized that moving out wont magically make everything good either because you still have to pay the mortgage/rent and thats another thing over your head. i thought of graduating high school as my big life goal but now its time for me to do other things. i keep breaking down my life in milestones but im starting to think its stupid. at the end of every finish line of life there is more bullshit after that that you have to be responsible for. i have pets and i love them very much but i have to buy their supplies and pay the vet bills. everything thats supposed to make me happy or excited for life is just another onslought of bullshit. i made an effort and now have a friend group but i got unhappy with seeing them. bullshit bullshit bullshit bullshit after bullshit
Better you learn while you have youth, health, strength, and sound mind, than discover it after one or more of those have left you, comrade. We have to work
onin the system, not for the system.milestone /mīl′stōn″/
noun A stone marker set up on a roadside to indicate the distance in miles from a given point. An important event, as in a child’s development, the history of a nation, or the advancement of knowledge in a field; a turning point.
It’s a resting place, a base camp, if needed.
A stone serving the same purpose as a milepost.
Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village though; He will not see me stopping here To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer To stop without a farmhouse near Between the woods and frozen lake The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake To ask if there is some mistake. The only other sound’s the sweep Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep. But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep.
I believe in you. And you do, too.
I feel you. I hate that I was brought into this life. I think the world is becoming like Ready Player One, soon we’ll all be crammed together in tiny spaces, the real world so awful that no-one goes outside any more and just spends all their time online in virtual reality to cope with it.
Only? I think it has to get better or else we’ll all die, which even the latter still may be an improvement from the hell you describe. So it’ll have to get better either way, the question is how much worse can it get and how long?
