That’s a good way to get yourself to no longer be the Prime Minister of Australia.

I spent a good chunk of my childhood in Birmingham, Alabama, and I can guarantee you there are no Tesco expresses or left-handed driving.

Okay, well, there is a little bit of left-handed driving, but it’s generally frowned upon.

What if they mean it like Loki?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swell_Foop

For some reason, I have an incredibly difficult time not saying like.

I bet if there were a word cloud of mymost commonly used words of all of my posts, “like” would be the sun in my fucking word solar system.

I would say that I’m a good enough person.

I do the things that good people do because it feels like the right thing to do, up until the point where I feel like I’m risking overextending myself and then I stop doing that.

I feel bad when I do not do a good thing.

At the same time I know I have done bad things. I have accepted my fault in those situations and apologized to the people that I have hurt in the past and I am still trying to become a better person. So I am good enough to pass for a good person, but I am not an objectively purely good person.

But then again, no one is.

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Addendum: Shoutout to the dude that lets me blow him just so we can kill you know who.

Maybe they were adamantium superconducting wires?

I, as a straight person, would probably do the same thing until I found out that I had to, like, I don’t know, suck a dick to do it.

Like, that’s gonna be the angriest blowjob that ever happened.

I’d be the light yagami grindr guy.

Yeah, think about it this way, if you were suicidal, but you knew that there was some rich dude that loved killing people, and watching them scream in terror as their life drained from their body, but would pay you, or pay your family, like a quarter of a million dollars to torture you to death…

That’s like a win-win, right?

You’re taking care of your family, you’re killing yourself, some dude gets his rocks off, everyone walks away happy.

No! That’s an abhorrent thing, and it should not be allowed to happen, but it definitely would happen if this were made a law.

This was so unfunny that it went into the “funny because its a dad joke / bad joke” territory and looped back around back into just being a bad joke.

I will say the art was good, and I could see where they were going with it, and if they kept it up, they probably could come up with some good stuff, but this one was just an absolute miss for me.

All work and no play makes Homer go crazy.

Since horses tend to live (at the upper range) between 18 and 35 years depending on their breed, if you add in an 80-year human life expectancy and divide that by two, then her 13 would work out to…

Oh, sorry, I would finish that, but apparently I’m going to jail.

Maybe taking estrogen will elevate your rank.

From the line of the last chicken genetic predecessor, when it laid an egg, was that egg a chicken’s egg since a chicken hatched from it, or was it a chicken predecessor’s egg?

I know this much is true.

I wear my sunglasses at night So I can, so I can Watch you weave then breathe your story lines

It’s probably easier to get UPS to pay than it is to get USPS to pay.

I recently shipped a $3,500 laptop across country through USPS and they just fucking lost it.

I had actually paid the extra for the insurance, so I filed a loss package claim, and they tried to offer me $50, and demanded that I show proof that the package that I sent to them that they lost was actually worth $3,500. They wanted receipts, they wanted pictures, they wanted everything to prove that that’s what it was.

Like, I paid them. I want to say $35 for the insurance (out of the company budget, it wasn’t my personal cash), and they wanted to put me through the ringer to actually live up to their side of the agreement.

Fortunately, after I filed the claim, they magically found the $3,500 laptop and then sent it on its way, but i- we literally paid for next day shipping, and it was not even next month when it finally arrived.

So needless to say, anytime we are shipping packages, we are using UPS because it’s going to be a hell of a lot easier to deal with them. And so far, they’ve never let us down.

This is evidence that if enough people get together and reject the companies that are profiting off of being evil to us, that the companies will start to change.

Of course, don’t get it wrong, Microsoft has not done nearly enough to undo the years of fuckery that they have been fucking with, but it is nice to see them move a little in the right direction.

They have a long way to go.