mendiCAN [none/use name]

calling epsteins list “the pedofiles” is low-key brilliant. thank you, i just know I’m gonna get mileage out of it

yeah

‘Another example of blatant jury nullification use of their lawful freedoms… how dare they undermine our monopoly on ‘justice’!

you likely already know but we’re celebrating the solstice already at Christmas. early Christians didn’t even celebrate his birth. a widely accepted reason they decided to celebrate it around this time of year is it overlapped the existing solstice celebration “dies solis invicti nati”, aka “saturnalia”

i like my rolled oats with peanut butter powder oatmilk and agave syrup, eaten cold. yummy. i am like you, can’t eat spicy or greasy breakfasts, my gut wakes up grumpy. if i need fuel before 9am it’s gotta be sumpin bready.

but then i couldnt pretend Clarence is praying to Stalin in “It’s a Wonderful Life”

oh no

sucked all the marrow from spider man, so i just started Miles Morales. turns out it’s set during Christmas so that’s cool

what if Carol is Gilligan and you just answered the question of what pluribus means?

maybe nuclear is good advice but hard nah on calling the cops. fuck the police there’s nothin they won’t make worse

is there a place i can watch Jake Paul’s jaw breaking? i can’t find clips n don’t want to watch the whole fight

hi! i’m really good at making small talk. you’ve heard this before but talk about something that interests them and they’ll love you. someone told me this once, i have used it, and i am very successful at it. helps if it’s not an affectation though. i genuinely like seeing the politeness mask or whatever fall off when i get people to talk about their interests. even if i don’t like the thing i get to see what it’s like to like the thing, and maybe i learn to like something outside my interests.

lots of times if they have any social skills they’ll reciprocate. then i get to go off on how All-Might represents the broken promises of the American MIC or whatever.

you didn’t necessarily ask for advice, hope ya don’t hate it

awww i was hoping to tuck into a 10 paragraph emoji deep dive!

did you make this? i love it

the person to her right looks like someone from SNL studying for the part.

aww i remember those days! i thought i was as cynical as i was gonna get ha ha ha ha ha ha

gotta have to be vague on details cuz its second hand and awhile ago but… they had to do with how many hours people have to volunteer to qualify for state aid, what hoops they must jump thru to get it, and who qualifies to receive said aid. sorry i don’t have more than that

oh they’re doing something about them. the big beautiful bill made it tougher to staff those panties, or so it was bitterly explained to me by the lady i know who runs my local one.